Thursday, March 29, 2007
God opened my eyes,forbid me from sins..let me drown in my own wallow
am at home at the mo..as usual in this so-called-too-big-for-me-room alone..as always..since kakak got married i feel like the only girl at home..went out for dinner with pa and ma..then went to abang's house to visit si kenit~ he is such a DOLL~!!saiko cute pleaseee~ then i was browsing through the internet..as usual..as nisa and yus said.."ko carila macam mana pun..sure tak jumpa..macam kitorang..duk berjam2 depan komputer pun tak jumpa2 jugak" huhuuhu..i definitely agree with that~ so mata macam nak bengkak..tadi email keitai nuren..omg~!!!she is s0oo gonna get in trouble if she doesnt get herslef connected to me before i graduated..lol..and ham~~ u balik today right?saje nak make sure..so that mana tau tomoro nite we can chat :P oh well mata dah tak larat nak bukak..tapi keje banyak nak buat as in project went like saiko tergendala at the mo~!!but then this fingers gatal bukak friendster..and i guess i get too obsessed..i went and search for faren's id..and GEDEGANG!!bila dah jumpa..rasa cam nak tutup2 je friendster dia..kan dah nyesal.. :P tak sukenyee..kenapa rasa cam tak berkenan?!!!huhuhu..but..oh well~!! Allah had opened my eyes so that i wont get myself into trouble..but i still think i am much better..oh apekah??~ :P
i don't judge people..but i did when i'm jealous and when i'm angry..so i'll go like.. "eleh..i am s0oo much better~" or "just because ur older doesnt mean u had the right to 'pijak my head'.." heuheuheuhe..and i will go and judge myself even more and bercakap sorang2 like.."siapala aku...muka takde..gemoks plak tuh..pendek :P yada yada yada" "*** definitely won't ****** me..sape lah aku.." etc etc etc..so i end up..wallowing alone..like kyle in his tub and as for me in my bed..more less like me in my comfort zone..under the greatness master comforter :'( it made me wonder..kenapa kita suka memperkecilkan diri sendiri bila kita rasa kita tak layak? kenapa kita fikir negatif bila hakikatnya tiada yang melihat dan mempertikai? kenapa kita putus asa hakikatnya kita belum pun mencuba...